Ask not for whom...

...the the demand for a parent-teacher meeting tolls... it tolls for ME.

So... I'm supposed to have a meeting with the parent who is accusing me of bullying her child.  The counselor called it, mostly because she can't believe that I'm capable of doing anything like that.  She thinks that we can probably work it all out.

Maybe.

I'm not worried - I'm prepared.  I've got documentation and grades on my side.  My student teacher, who was also present during all of the class sessions, will also be in attendance. 

But more than anything else - somehow it just feels appropriate that I get challenged once in a while.  It keeps me on my toes, it keeps me asking the right questions about myself and my teaching, and it helps me deal with possible future parent complaints, regardless of whether or not they are valid.

Of course, I'm saying all this without knowing whether or not angry parent is lining up a lawyer... that has been known to happen in this town.

I'll check in with y'all on the other side.

If by "bullying" you mean...

...holding your child accountable for their behavior and lack of participation, then yes, I did that.  The formal complaint to the administrator, by the way was "Mr. Maestro uses his position of authority to bully my child"

I'm not losing sleep over it, although it is hanging on my consciousness more than I would like it to.  Fortunately, the assistant principal has my back on this.  He's even trying to get the kid into another class, which is fine with me because it's is apparent that he never wanted to be in beginning band in the first place. Electives, I believe, should be elected - ultimately that is an issue with counseling and the fact that Former Principal Palpatine axed a chunk of our electives to make way for more honors and AP classes.

The interesting thing about this particular case, however, is the fact that I've been using this student as a sort of guinea-pig for testing out new approaches to difficult students.  Up until a few years ago - this particular mother might have had a point.  I had a bully mode that I could kick into high gear when I wanted to.  The fact that the kids who were on the receiving end of that deserved it is irrelevant - I have re-evaluated and my methods to align with my philosophy as it has evolved over time.  I never liked 'hulking out' on my students.  Rather than establishing authority, it just felt like losing control, and ultimately respect.  At the same time, however, you can't let students walk all over you... so what to do, what to do...

This year (and with this kid in particular) I've adopted an attitude of engaging the student every day in a positive manner, but letting them experience the consequences for their decisions.  As much as possible, I try to handle disciplinary situations privately.  No threats.  No yelling. No intimidation of any kind...  and I've been holding to it.  I feel good about it. 

So, I'm not going to worry too much about this student or his mom...  If I'm lucky, he'll be gone in a little while, anyway.  I also have a student teacher and two trusted TAs who have witnessed my daily struggles with this kid - so that helps.

...ah... but then there's still the presence of his three friends who behave exactly the same way... *sigh*