March Musings Pt. II

Remember that e-mail from the dad of the twinsies how missed the concert? Well here's how that situation went down (I'll give you the truncated version of the e-mail exchange)

Dad: Mr Maestro - please excuse my daughters from the concert. They had a family function.

Me: Sorry, all conflicts are supposed to be worked out with me ahead of time. No can do

Dad: Allrighty then.

*an hour later - after he checks their grade on-line*

Dad: Wait a second - they both have Fs now. How dare you penalize them for being prevented from being at the concert by an emergency situation that we couldn't predict nor control. I want a meeting with the principal!

Me: Oh, was it an emergency? Silly me, when I read 'family function' I assumed it was some kind of a planned event.... because you know, that's what it sounds like. Some of my students just lack the responsibility to communicate their schedule conflicts with me. But of course, your daughters would never do that (despite the fact that they have not yet shown up to any performance this year and have never communicated a reason why to me... oopsie! did I say that out loud?). Certainly it must have been an unforeseeable emergency. Well, tell you what - being that it was an emergency, I will allow them to make up the concert grade. That means I own them for about an hour after school - they can do some cleaning and filing for me. Yeah, that'll do it. That's standard procedure, you know. All the kids with excusable concert absences have to do it. (And you know, the ones who have legitimate excused absence don't mind.... oopsie I did it again!!!)

By the way, that 'F' grade only appeared because there are only two grades on the books right now - the February Participation Grade and the Spring Concert grade - had you waited a couple of months, the participation grade would have eventually brought the total grade up to a C or so... unless the girls plan on missing more concerts, in which case, there would be a much smaller improvement. But of course, they wouldn't miss any more concerts, would they? I have time available between X a.m. and Y a.m. to meet with you an Middle School Principle Gus if you so wish. Let me know.

I haven't heard back yet.

To Pee or NOT To Pee

Speaking of MS Principal Gus... he sent out an e-mail this week that basically asked all teachers to refrain from letting students out of class to use the restroom during session. They are having vandalism problems. Now, for me, the only class this applies to is my (you guessed it) beginning band - the kids are more interested in the line for the bathroom than in their instruments. I would love nothing more than to tell them "Tough shit - hold it in and do the pee-pee dance if you have to. You're not leaving class." But can I really get away with that? Gus said "Only in emergency situations should you release them." Well it doesn't take a genius to see that the same five kids will have an 'emergency' on a daily basis.

What do you guys think? What Should I do?

Concert Highs and Lows

So we had a concert last night. For the most part it went well. All the groups were prepared, most of the students behaved well. Set up and tear-down went quickly. Boo-Yah.

I only had one complaint - most of the families decided to peel off once their kid was done with their part of the performance, leaving the last group with something like 1/3 of the audience that the first group had. Shame, because one of the best things on the program was the very last thing performed.

A couple of WTF moments:

One of the beginning band girls basically hasn't shown up to school since .... oh..... February. She wanted to know if she could sit in and get some credit for the concert. I told her no, since we were playing things she hadn't even seen. Plus, she didn't even have a working instrument. Today she didn't show up to class again. Go figure.

Two choir girls missed the concert out-right. In fact, they have yet to show up to a concert this year. Similar story with their brother, before he got booted out of school for ditching an assembly to go smoke pot. Today, one of them gave me a note from Dad asking me to excuse his daughters since they were at a 'family function' that required their participation. I e-mailed the dad and basically said that it was too late, any conflicts had to be worked out ahead of time. I just saw that there is a response sitting in my in-box, but I'm not going to look at it until tomorrow. I'd just as soon enjoy a nice evening with the family.

March Musings

Go Figure

So in order to alleviate my conscience, I pull the kid who I yelled at a week ago into my office and apologized - I'm not so much sorry that I lost it at him, but that at the time he was doing didn't warrant that kind of a reaction. He accepted the apology. The next day he went back to being a jerk. Yeah.

My Reputation Precedes Me... THAT MUCH?

Got an email from a girl in Germany. She's going to move to the US next year and go to our school. She heard that our choir program was very good. She wants to audition for my advanced choir.

Umm... sure... Yeah, That'd be fine.

Speaking Of My Advanced Choir:

Went to a vocal festival yesterday. 'Superior' rating. Awesome. It still trips me out, though, that I'm a band guy, and I can't seem to get higher than a 'good' rating with my instrumental groups, while my advanced choir has gotten consistent 'superiors.' Of course, my instrumental groups are mixed HS/MS... so there's always going to be that problem with the playing level.

Anyway, I was really happy with the festival results because while we did well, we were not quite the best choir there, so my students got a chance to see a slightly better choir. At our next festival, chances are there will be a higher standard - some of the choirs will be not just slightly better, they'll be a LOT better. That will be good for my little pumpkins to see.

Girl Drama

So now I have these 7th grade girls - former friends who are now at war with each other. They're trying to drag me into it, by accusing and possibly framing each other for little offenses. Phhh... I'm suddenly very grateful for my own kid's Y chromosome.

Misquoted

For the last year, I've been using this quote at the end of my e-mails:

"It is cruel, you know, that music should be so beautiful." - Samuel Barber

It's a beautiful thought... except it turns out that Barber didn't say it. Benjamin Britten did.

Damn.

Oh well, change my signature... chances are no one will even notice. But still...

Damn.

One of those days....

.... where you try to be a good person, and suddenly you realize that you've been swinging a red light saber around.

I'm starting to wonder why I haven't been getting parent phone calls about my beginning instruments class. I mean - yesterday I was borderline verbally abusive... I actually told a kid "I don't care where you go, just get out of my classroom."

No that's not quite true. I didn't tell him, I screamed it at him.

I yell a lot in that class... it's something that is not second nature to me. I'm trying to figure out how I managed to develop the ability to go from total pacifist to complete asshole in 60 seconds. But as I was driving off campus to go teach a private lesson, I think I figured it out.

As I said before, my method of classroom management relies on rapport with the class. I have allies among the students - they help me maintain order in the classroom without having to use more formal disciplinary measures. But the beginning class is all new kids - and mostly 7th graders. I've also come to realize that there is a concentration of kids with formal discipline records in that class (I actually saw a group of about six of them all walking to after school detention together one day). In short, this is not a class where a simple "No really guys, I need you to be cool" works.

Now here is where one of my weaknesses comes into play - one that I've just figured out, and one that might surprise you: I have anger management issues. That doesn't mean that I blow up without warning. In fact very few people have seen me blow. What it means is that when I do get angry, I don't know how to manage it very well. Voila - instant asshole, just add smart-mouthed 7th grader.

Realizing this is a big step - because what it brought to light is the fact that the reason why I am such an easy-going teacher is that I subconsciously fear my inability to express my frustration and anger without going overboard.

It also means that I can look at my beginning instruments class as a sign of my own emotional instability - or - as an opportunity to work out those issue without having to pay a therapist. I choose the latter, although I do feel sorry for the beginning students. It may be a bit of a journey for us both.

****

So yeah... yesterday was one of those days where I just wanted to go home and play with my kid. But I had a private lesson to teach. It's a bit of a drive, and my wife allways asks me why I don't have the student come to me. I think part of it is because the student lives high on a hill in a pretty beach town, and the drive home looks like this:

Teacher to Parent

One thing I am interested in discovering is how my experiences as a teacher will affect me as a parent, and vice- versa.

Take my 4th period class: I yell at them a lot - and I'm not a yeller. But for them I am. The other day I was looking at sweet little Maestro Jr. and asked myself if I would accept a teacher yelling at him the way I do my 4th period... even if he deserved it. The flip side of the question is whether or not I'll ever yell at Maestro Jr. the way I yell at my 4th period... some day when he's...oh... 13 or so. Time will tell.

The one lesson that's sunk in more than anything is the shortness of time. You meet a kid - he or she is really cool, s mart, funny, hard working.... you grow to love them and rely on them and what happens? They up and graduate on you. Every. Single. Last. One.

It's not like you can even complain about it... I mean he'll our jobs are to get them to graduate right? So the lesson is to enjoy the time you have when you have it.

So, all you people who have been telling me "Enjoy it while you can... they grow up so fast."

Yeah... I know....

I'm sure if I practiced, I would have an easier time saying "no"

I will admit to this - I am a disgustingly easy person to take advantage of. Take drama teacher's upcoming music theater show. He came to me (a little over a week ago) asking for help finding musicians to play in the pit. It is unclear as to whether or not he expects me to have anything to do with the production beyond that. He said he's not using a conductor, but I don't know how he's going to keep the band together.

I'm also not sure if he wants me to help assemble the product(ie. attend the rehearsals) I can't really do it with Maertro Jr. at home - my wife would go nuts without my help and we'd have to send the little guy to his granparent's for the week.

The problem is, he isn't the best communicator, and he hasn't responded to my e-mails.

Last minute stuff stresses me out - and while I do it to myself all the time, I can't handle someone else's last minute stuff and mine at the same time. I'm already a wreck this weekend from being sick and trying to organize all sorts of music department stuff.

Ugh, I'm getting too old for this.

Too Much of a Good Thing?

I have generally felt that the community that works for me appreciates my efforts. I know that I have some parents who rave about me as if I was the musical equivalent of Jaime Escalante. I try to take all that in stride - after all, I know how many music teachers there out there who outpace me.... greatly. Here at Newe Republic High School, I've held a sort of balance - the artsy families love me, while the athletics parents are some where between fairly appreciative to critical of my "lack of support" for their kids. I've accepted this.

Today one of my students mom caught up with me after school. She proceeded to thank me for intervening in an incident that was brewing between her son and another kid in band. (Fortunately, it smoothed put pretty quickly - no referrals, no threats). She went on to tell me how much she saw that the community appreciates me (Again, something already I know, and feel very grateful for).

She started talking about a PTA meeting she attended hwere they voted on purchasing me a gift for newly-arrived Maestro Jr. This must have been a while back - I got that gift back in December. It wasn't too extravagant: a bunch of decorative boxes for storage of... I don't know, baby stuff I suppose. They're nice. Anyway, apparently, there was something of a discussion as to why I was getting a gift when none of the other teachers got anything for their new babies.

WHAT?!?

Holy bajeezus, I had no idea that I was the only person getting baby gifts from PTA... I assumed that it was a little something they did for everyone! Band mom went on to say that several parents chimed in as to how I work so hard, and contribute so much to the school... and how I came off of paternity leave to bring a group of kids to play at a PTA event. I guess there wasn't that much of an argument over it, but it did make me a little uncomfortable to know that I was the center of that kind of discussion. And truthfully, had I been there, I would have asked why I deserved to receive anything, no matter how small, when so many of my colleagues who work as hard as I do did not.

I know I sound paranoid, but it makes me wonder if this kind of thing will eventually generate bad feelings - perceptions that I'm over-rated and over-praised. I mean, it was only last year that my students/parents threw me an on-campus 40th birthday party that truly humbled me, and made me wonder if it... I don't know, made my colleagues envious or something.

I guess I should just shut up and be happy that I'm being appreciated.

Dear Students

If you accidentally leave your cel phone in my room, rest assured that I will take a photo of myself and leave it as your wallpaper. Just a little love from the Maestro.

The Crisis of Central Falls H.S.

Well, all the current trend in edublogs across the net is to rage over the goings on at Central Falls High School - The Rhode Island institution that recently let go all of it's teachers and administrators over the school's poor performance.

There are more than a few media sources that are painting the teachers out to be the bad guys - the money-hungry teachers who refuse to put in any extra time to help rescue a community in crisis unless there is pay involved. It's one of the many issues that make people on the outside distrustful of teacher's unions. From the inside, this is what it looks like:

I know very few teacher's (and from what I understand, the Central Falls faculty are the same) who wouldn't put in an extra half-hour every day to help students who needed it. In fact, that happens all the time. If I added up all the unpaid work time I've put in and demanded back-pay for it - I'd be in a different tax bracket for sure. Hell, I might be able to live in the community in which I teach. But see

Now I understand that there is a school of thought that points out that in the business world, people are often told that they will have to kick in more time, effort, blood, sweat and tears all the time - and that's just the way it is. The company falls on hard times - people have to be let go, and the remaining staff has to pick up the slack. This is not an invalid statement. But the problem with that analogy is this: In that scenario, the issue isn't the product - it's the distribution of resources.

Imagine this scenario:

"Folks, the widgets we sell are horrible! They fall apart after the first use! We need to change how we make our widgets! So starting immediately, all workers will spend an extra 30 minutes on the factory floor."

Of course, this doesn't make any sense. Keeping the staff longer hours to continue to perform the same task that obviously isn't working is practically the definition of stupidity. Thus, keeping a faculty after school to help kids succeed with a curriculum that isn't reaching them to begin with is similarly stupid.

So, is this saying that the problem is that the assembly process is flawed? (ie. bad teaching) No, not necessarily. But most teachers design their lessons with cooperation in mind, not resistance. After all - the widgets don't have a will of their own - they are not fighting the process of being 'made.' Students, especially students from economically challenged areas have a way of doing that.

So what is the answer? The answer is that the entire community has to contribute to the solution. It is NOT just a teacher issue. If the students were showing up every day, trying to do the work and cooperating with the process, THEN it would be a teacher issue. And I'm not saying that every teacher at CFHS is blameless - like all faculty, they probably have their weak links (and I do admit that sometimes the unions go out of their way to protect teachers they shouldn't). But unless the students and parents get behind the effort, there is no way that any staff restructuring could have any effect.

Some people may want to point to the Jaime Escalantes of the world - the teachers who overcome incredible odds and get through' to their students. And while I am just as inspired by his story as everyone else, I can't help but wonder why every teacher is expected to work through as much difficulty and come out victorious.