Comfort and Joy

Well, here we are at the beginning of Winter Break. I'm fully prepared to enjoy it as much as possible. My grand and glorious plan to have CLAD done before break didn't quite work out. But you know, had I actually given myself two full weeks of nothing to do, I would have evolved into a video game/ daytime television degenerate. As appealing as it may sound, you start to ponder the meaning of your existence after a few days.

As much as I like caroling, I'm glad the season is over. Especially when the end of the run marked the beginning of the realization that this year's senior class needs to go. It always comes with a little disappointment... and make no mistake... it does inevitably come: students who were once your best and most dedicated suddenly become self absorbed and no longer pull for the good of the group. Our last caroling event of the year... the annual party that happens on the last day of school before break. We meet at one of the students houses for food and drink... then walk around the neighborhood singing to anyone who will hear. This year we sang one or two sets, then a bout a third of the party decided to "go do their own thing" and split off from the main group without saying anything to me. When we caught up with them they said "Oh we lost track of you guys, we didn't know where you went" (using the crowded boardwalk as an excuse). One of my not-so-falky seniors whispered to me under her breath- "Thats BS, they asked me if I wanted to go with them." Later when they rejoined us, the same group of seniors started screwing around while they were singing, and failed to notice that they were phasing out of time with the rest of the group. *sigh*

Unfortunately I'm talking about three out of my four section leaders.... Yeah, it's time.

But before I brood too much about that, let me tell you about this morning:

One of my more dedicated seniors and I took the time to visit a student who had gone to the hospital with a collapsed lung. Unfortunately, he missed both the recent concert and the caroling party. We brought him some goodies, including cards signed by the music classes that he is enrolled in. We happened to catch him when his parents were there; they were impressed that I would come to see him. He seemed to be doing well, although the corrective surgery left him in a bit of pain. His spirits were pretty good, all things considered (He was asleep when we walked in, the first thing he said when he woke up was "I was dreaming that I was eating Chinese food")

On the white board next to his bed was written the details of his care: who the managing doctor was, the nurse, the anesthesiologist... and a space at the bottom labeled "Today's goals" under which a single word: "Comfort" was written. I grabbed the dry erase pen and added "and Joy"
This made him laugh.. which I immediately regretted since it also inspired a small coughing fit. Nonetheless, he kept smiling, and his mother gave me a hug before we left.

"I love it when we don't suck"

...that's a little thing my conducting teacher used to say after concerts. I thought it was funny, so I kept it and use it frequently. Sometimes my students get a little offended: "You mean there are times when we do suck?" Mostly they get the joke. Actually I get fewer funny looks than I do when I use my traditional motivational phrase I stole from Lord of the Rings just before a concert: "You do not know pain, you do not know fear.... you will taste MAN-FLESH"

Any way... concert tonight was good. Logistically it was one of the smoothest ever. One of my student leaders handled all of the set-up. One of the parents handled all of the reception details. I just showed up and waved my arms. It was awesome.

I couldn't help but fire a little torpedo at Papatine at the end as I was giving my last bit to the audience before the final song:

"As pressure form the federal government and state government bears down on education, many of my colleagues turn their arguments in favor of music education towards the benefits of music in improving cognitive skills and test scores. That's all well and good, but I'm a musician because of the effects of beauty on my life. I think everyone should experience beauty... more importantly, I think eveyrone should have the opporunity to unlock the beauty in themselves and let the world see it. That's what music is all about."

I got a standing ovation.

Later, when I was talking to a group of parents, one of them said "I sure Palpatine had been here to hear what you said about test scores." I bit my lip a little. Anyone who knows me knows how deliberate that little speech was. But had the Imperial P actually been there... I don't think it would have made much of a difference. She continued: "You know, it would be nice to see her once in a while."

My accompanist, who loves to play devil's advocate, responded "Well, you know principals are very busy... I'm sure they have a hard time going to every school function."

That's when my ID saw and opening and got a shot in. It just blurted out: "Yeah... besides... she gets to see us at the pep rallies."

One of the parents looked at me with a grin and said "you are so bad!"

Browner Pastures

So on my way home from work I get a call on my cel phone from a guy who used to work for me as a coach, and is now a full time band teacher. I had called him a few weeks ago just to say hi. Left a message on his voice mail. He was just now getting back to me.

He got his first job working for a school in a not so-affluent area of Orange County. After about a year, he went looking for another gig. It turns out he took an assistant band director job at a much bigger school. He has to take orders from another guy, but apparently he's much happier. I hadn't really talked with him in a while, so I wasn't sure what the full story was.

"Was *YOU FORMER SCHOOL* that bad?" I asked him.

"Dude, it was a bloody mess by the time I left," He said. "I decided to do things a little differently from the last band director, and I had students and parents in my office screaming sat me. I decided to drop some of the pep songs that were favorites of the football coach, and he sent the varsity team to come harass me. They actually started telling me what the band would play at the next game."

I was speechless. "Good thing you got out of there," I said.

"I almost didn't," he responded. "When I resigned in May, they tried to strong-arm me into staying, saying that when I was hired, it was for an implied two year term. Lawyers got involved... it was messy. Then the HR people tried to tell me that it was my responsibility to find my own replacement."

You know, I just came back from a holiday party at a home with a multi-million dollar view of the Pacific, hosted by a very generous PTA... and the place was filled with people who tell me how wonderful I am on a regular basis.

Hmmm... maybe I'll put off updating my resume a little.

I want a bottle of Valium for Christmas

The chaos of the holiday season is upon me. I don't even mean the usual decorating/shopping/card sending craziness... I'm talking about the endless string of performances and duties that besiege the working musician. Man, if all I had to do was shop, send cards and decorate, I'd be happy. As it is, I'm not sure how I'm making it through my classes, as well as preparing two major holiday concerts.

Add to this the pressure of trying to finish two CLAD classes before break. I really have until January, but I suspect that all the other procrastinators will be sending their packets in at about the same time, effectively jamming the system. The earlier I can get it in, the better. Of course, it's my fault for not getting started earlier (like I promised myself in August). Still, I think I can get it all done. I think I owe it to myself to not have to worry about it over break. Thats worth a few late nights at the computer.

I thought I could get some good distance on it this weekend; I only had a couple of light caroling gigs and a private lesson. But I forgot my annual appearance at the local Mormon holiday pageant. (This started some years ago when one of the parents asked me to play my instrument in their concert: pound out a couple of jazzy holiday tunes and pick up some instrumental parts on their choral pieces. It's an easy gig, but it does take a chink of time. I've lost track of how many years I've been doing it.)

This year went as smooth as always. The Mormons are generally nice folk. I feel a little weird hanging out in concentrated groups of them... kind of like an evil coffee-drinking, R-rated-movie-watching, occasional-bad-language-using abomination in their midst. But they certainly don't treat me as such, and they feed me pretty well.

Comfort and Joy

So, ever since I've worked at *MY SCHOOL* I've been pretty daring about performing religious music at the holidays. So far, everyone's been cool about it. I'm not particularly religious, I just think that the sacred stuff is better music.

I love caroling season. There's something about assaulting people with random acts of beauty.
And when I have a group of singers out in front of a crowd, I get choked up with pride... literally. I try to sing a long with them, but often I have to stop because I can feel a lump of sentimentality forming in my throat, stealing my breath. I've never told them that, maybe I should.

Tonight, one of my former students tagged along on a gig. He's currently attending a local Christian university. He's pretty involved with their music program. He says there's an opening for a band and orchestra conductor, and thought I might be interested. (Apparently, it's something of an assistant position)

Interesting.... I don't know how qualified I might be. I have a master's in instrumental conducting. But universities prefer people who sign their names "Doctor so-and-so" I know band well enough, and I have some orchestra experience. Honestly, I want to interview just to see what chance I have of a gig like that. The idea of working with college players is... appealing. I don't know, it sounds like a pipe dream... but then so did conducting Beethoven at one time... and I've since done that several times. I need more info.