A Rising Star

One of my students today informed me that one of the other beginning choir girls has decided that, rather than staying with the school's music program, she's going to withdraw and pursue a "solo career." She doesn't want to remain in my choir because she doesn't want it to "get in the way."

Umm... Okay....

Ms. Starlet has been in my lower choir since she was a 7th grader. In fact it was because of choir class that she developed a love for singing (I gave her a solo in her first year, and it kind of took off from there.) Once she became a freshman, I kind of wondered why she didn't audition for my advanced choir. Someone said it was because my advanced choir is classical-heavy (which it is) and she didn't want to be a classical singer. Okay... fair enough... although I'm not sure where it's written that being in a classical choir ruins your "other" kinds of singing.

Now, I wasn't really angry when I heard this. After all, a student certainly has the freedom to decide whether or not to participate in my program. I was a little sad... she is a good singer and a nice kid. But I don't know if I'd call her a great singer (though she may have the potential.) She's one of those kids who loves to sing, and singing is her life. And far be it from me to say that she couldn't be an American Idol winner some day. I just don't think she's there yet... and I also don't think she's beyond being in a school choir.

I know she doesn't mean any insult, but some how it feels a little like a betrayal. I'm only saying that because... well, I had a special place that helped me find a passion for music. I never outgrew that place, and I still give back to it to this very day. That's too much to expect out of other people, I know... but I can't help but feel sad nonetheless.

More Writing On The Wall

....more writing that spells eminent doom for Principal Palpatine. It's getting so bad for her, I'm starting to wonder if her career in education is pretty much over. I mean, the legal battle that she's caught up in has gone public in a such big way... all anyone has to do is google her name and out pours a plethora articles and blogs from across the internet universe that paint her in a very bad light. Of course, there's still no official word from the district as to what's happening with the supposed "administrative shuffle" next year... only rumors (and vague ones at that).

Today I talked with a colleague - Sam, a middle school band director form another district who wants to borrow an instrument from me. Nice guy... a little long winded. Three important things to know about him: 1) He's a graduate of Empire High School (back in the early 80's) and marched in the now-extinct marching band 2) He's a former administrator who decided to ditch it all and go back to the classroom. 3) He's been friends with one of our district higher-ups since grade school. And now the little bit of info that makes all of that really interesting.... he was recently asked by the aforementioned friend if he would ever consider coming back to EHS as an administrator.

....hmmmm.....

Again, it's not enough to throw a party over... and like I said before, I don't know how much partying I'd do anyway. There's no telling whether or not my next principal will be just as bad or worse. After all... as much grief as Palpatine gave me, she never took steps to eliminate the music program at EHS. There are others who would.

During the conversation Sam said "All administrators lie, you and I both know this." I don't know if I agree with him. I do know honest administrators. But I would say that the system is geared to reward the dishonest/ambitious ones. I'm also taking note of the fact that Sam got out of the admin game... so he's probably more than a little jaded.

He left me with a bit of advice that I'm going to examine: "Never say 'no' to a principal. They'll find ways of getting to you." Now obviously, I don't think he meant "As a teacher, you have no choice but to bend over and take it"... just that open resistance is usually not the route to take.

I can say for sure that my own situation with Palpatine didn't get better until I started making her think that I was giving her everything that she wanted. True... it put me back on her "good servant" list, but I do feel like I caved on my principles a little. In the long run it's probably better to be out of the crosshairs, I suppose. Still, she's taken to being nice to me (as I said before) which makes my skin crawl. I still harbor a lot of pent-up anger towards her, and while I'm not openly attacking or defying her, I'm certainly in no mood to be her "buddy." It's the main reason that I haven't told her that I'm having a kid... I really don't want any congratulations (or worse.... hugs) from her. It would feel fake, and I don't want it.

Only two days ago I got a little reminder of her strong-arm tactics: an email that informed me that my monthly stipend would be shortened for the next couple pay checks. Back in the Fall when I was in open conflict with Palpatine over the marching band issue, she instructed one of the VPs to look over my stipends with a fine tooth comb to see if I was fulfilling my responsibilities. That cost me about $2000 in R&R units. Now I can't really get mad at that, since the stipend that I lost was specifically tied to marching band, and being that I'm not doing marching band I shouldn't get it. But the e-mail was a reminder of how far she went to find a way to control me. After all, none of my other stipends were examined, just the one that mattered to her.

You know, once upon a time I was a blissfully ignorant young teacher who trusted my supervisors and assumed that they would just leave me to do the best job I knew how to do. These days... well... I'm not necessarily paranoid of all administrators, but I will certainly have a bigger price tag on my loyalty.

Mad Photoshop Skillz

Okay, I need to show off a little. I'm putting on a big Baroque concert next month, and I just made the fliers for it. I rigged up this little beauty in Photoshop. It's going on the flier with the caption "Classical music makes you smarter."

Llama of the Week

Okay, I admit it.... I blatantly stole this one from the "trunk monkey" commercial....

Takin' It On The Road

So.... what do you do when it's a lazy Friday morning and your 1st period choir gives you that "We've been singing the same three songs for weeks" look? You take the a-capella song they know kind-of-sort-of pretty-good and you walk around school performing it to unsuspecting victims. We started off going to the JV gymnasium, which was empty at the time (just for the acoustics). Then I said "Hey, since it's a song in Latin, let's go sing it for the Latin teacher!" A few of the kids were a little embarrassed, but I got more "YEAH"s than "NOOOOOO"s. So off we went.

The Latin teacher was tickled, and afterwords gave us the translation of the text (which is basically the "Hail Mary" prayer for you Catholics). After that we decided to go to the admins office and sing for the counselors (All the VPs and even Principal Palpatine came out to listen to us), and finnished off our grand tour in the hallway in front of the math classes. I kept thinking someone would come out and yell at us for disturbing their class, but everyone seemed to enjoy it.

I've done this sort of thing during the holidays with my advanced choir, but never my 1st period kids. It was neat, I think they really enjoyed it. (Or if they didn't, they at least faked it well).

Good way to start a Friday.

Home Sick

I once heard that there was a saying amongst teachers: Never waste a sick day being sick. I don't know how wide spread that really is, but it makes me chuckle. I usually don't spend sick days frivolously. There was one year that I used one in December (after my winter concerts were all done) to do some extra shopping.

When I first started teaching, I was afraid to use sick days because of the daunting task of preparing sub plans. I think I was just afraid that someone would find out that I didn't know how to run my class. Then one day I got horrendously sick... food poisoning I think. I was forced to call in. Once that happened, and I returned a couple of days later to find that my classroom hadn't burned down in my absence... well, it kind of opened up possibilities. After that I called in at least once a month for "mental health" reasons. Again, it was my first year and I felt overwhelmed most of the time.

These days I don't use my sick time. I usually come to work anyway if I have a cold. I stock up on flu remedies and just power through the day. Yesterday I had kind of a tough day... I was fighting off heavy symptoms and trying to put up with the recent freaky heat wave in a classroom with no air conditioning. At the end of the day I looked at myself in the mirror and said "You know what? I'm not coming in tomorrow." I tried to idiot-proof the room as much as possible, typed up a quick sub guide/lesson plan, called for the sub, and left.

I'm lucky that I have numerous assistants and responsible students who will help run things while I'm gone. As far as I know, everything went well. It was certainly a rather uneventful day for me. I probably should have spent most of it sleeping, but I was on the computer playing old games.

I did get one phone call from my accompanist, who told me that everything went well. He said that Autistic Sally in 1st period actually started crying when she heard I was sick, and kept asking how I was doing (sweet). I really don't want to know how Autistic Billy reacted.

I told everyone I'd wait and see how I was feeling before I made a decision whether or not I'll go back tomorrow. I'm feeling better, I'll probably go in.

The End In Sight

I'm starting to think that the chance of Principal Palpatine being here at Empire High School next year are getting slimmer and slimmer. If she isn't dismissed outright, she'll probably be shuffled to another school. Of course there's nothing official, so there's no reason to throw a party just yet.... just rumors that the district is thinking about re-shuffling the principal deck and dealing new hands.

You'd think that I, of all people, would be fidgety with anticipation. I'm not.... I'm actually kind of numb. My conflicts with Palpatine have already left my overall perspective of working under a principal as a wasteland of destruction. So it looks like we're winning the war, but the city is burning.

I'm actually not quite as pessemistic as that sounds. I'm just reflecting on my own curious indifference. Had this all been going down a year ago... six months ago... I would be approaching all of this very differently. I think that once I heard that she was planning on staying another year after this one (it was January or so when that reached me) something... changed. It was like accepting the occupation of a hostile foreign entity. Suddenly I foresaw not just one year, but several. After all, if it's glory through test scores that she wants, there's really no place better than Empire High School (in the public school system, anyway). We already have a pre-existing paranoia over college resume's and GPA. All we need is a little "guidance" and we could be transformed into the high-numbers machine that would have launched her career into educational fame.

So I stopped waiting for the cavalry to come in and save the day, and started trying to maneuver myself so that I was off her radar. Once I did that, I started sleeping better, and I stopped driving to work miserable. Happiness was on the return. She even started being nice to me... Make no mistake though, I am still bitter about her attempts to shape the Empire High Music Department to be her little PR dog-and-pony show... as well as the strong-arm scare tactics and behind-the-scenes scheming that she employed against me over the years. I haven't forgotten, nor forgiven.

It's for that reason that I became a link in a chain of people that worked to collect information and pass it along to people who can do something about it. It may not even be necessary at this point; there are far more controversial and very public issues that are threatening to be her undoing. Those same issues are, however, causing a lot of collateral damage along the way. It's kind of the equivalent of using a nuke to take out a dictator. Even Bush was smart enough to avoid that (barely).

In short... even if her office gets cleaned out by the end of the week, I don't know if I'll be in the mood to do any celebrating. The task of rebuilding is enormous, and the uncertainty of the future of Empire High is daunting. I will, however, enjoy a touch of what one might call.... satisfaction.

Llama of the Week

Mixed Feelings

Today was a weird day. I woke up in some kind of a funk... I don't know why. Some of my kids noticed and asked me what was wrong, and I couldn't really say. I think I was stewing over the thought that while I try to be an inspiring teacher, I don't think I do particularly well at being a demanding one. That's why I have attendance and commitment problems. It seems as if even among the top groups a lot the kids will drop a rehearsal or even a performance without so much as a second though if they have something "more important" to do. And I put up with it.

It's a rare day, but it does happen, when a thought crosses my mind that would scare the hell out of my students: I have pretty much convinced myself that I can outlast Principal Palpatine... or any principal for that matter. But sometimes I wonder if somewhere out there there was a school that was just a little.... hungrier for a good music teacher. Of course, the next thought that hits my mind is that if the problem is me, then it doesn't matter where I go - the students will learn to take advantage of me regardless.

My students haven't actually driven me to look at the job listings.... but sometimes they make me day-dream about being in a different environment... some Shangri-La school with a big music enrollment - a healthy feeder and a big budget. And no student ever skipped out because they were too tired from studying late, or missed a concert because of a baseball game or an AP Test study session. No student ever walked in late with a Starbucks cup in their hand, nor had their chemistry book stuffed underneath their music folder during rehearsal.

Yeah right.

But really, I'm not angry with them as much as I'm angry at myself (and dear friends, you know this is nothing new. Absorbing blame is practically an art form with me.) It's a great school with a lot of perks... I'd be crazy to leave. And I'm not crazy. Well... I'm not that crazy. I also know that when I eventually take a step back, take a deep breath and look at my roll sheet again, I'll see the names of the kids who have never missed a day, never been late.... never so much as even looked bored during rehearsal. I'll also see the names of people who have made huge sacrifices out of the other areas of their life for the music program... no... for me.

I don't know... it was just one of those days. And nothing really happened to bring it up... it was just festering there in my mind.

On the brighter side:

This year I've been playing trumpet a lot. Mostly because my trumpet players are, generally speaking, so weak that I've been forced to try and demonstrate for them. Folks... I don't play trumpet... not well, anyway. But today something happened that totally caught me off guard: for the first time ever, I hit a G just above the staff. For you non-musical types, know that playing higher notes on a trumpet is more difficult, thus setting the basis by which all trumpet players manage their ego judge their worth.

Now, a G isn't really a big deal for a brass player, but for a born-and-bred woodwind guy, it was pretty exciting. The weird thing is that I was just trying to hit the third space E, and the G popped out instead. When I figured out what I had done, I tried it again, thinking that it was a freak accident, but the G popped again.... and a again. I blew a series of short, rhythmic bursts, and the G kept coming back. Weird. I'll try it again next week and see if I can still do it.

On the kind-of-brighter-side:

After stressing out about how I was going to fit musical theater duty into my schedule... it turns out the that vocal coach that the drama teacher hired wants to conduct the pit himself. While I thoroughly enjoy conducting the shows, I didn't argue because it's the drama teacher's circus, and if he wants to let this guy do it... that's fine. I'd rather not make waves. I also realize that since Vocal Coach has more of a grasp of how the show flows... he's probably more qualified to do it anyway. The other reason I didn't complain is that I just got about 100+ hours of my life back.... Just think of all the things I can do with it. Like Sleep.

Orchestra Takes the Spotlight

So last night we had our annual all-district all-inclusive instrumental music extravaganza. We take every high school band, every middle school band and every elementary school band combine them them into larger performing units, then into one giant juggernaut of sound. This all goes down at the school that has the largest gymnasium. It's a logistical nightmare that turns all of the involved music teachers into an army of screaming maniacs.

This year, instead of throwing the sting players in with the mass-band, the organizers decided to let the string groups perform their own pieces this year. The fun part - there was no "combined high school orchestra".... because there is only one string orchestra at the secondary level in our district... mine. That means that while every other performing group consisted of at least 200 kids from at least 3 different schools, the secondary string group was made up of the 17 kids we brought from Empire High.

I wasn't nervous about how my kids would do... I knew they were prepared. I was, however, very nervous about whether or not we could get a gym full of people quiet enough to hear them. The dress rehearsal didn't do anything to alleviate my fears: the horde of fidgety middle school band kids wouldn't shut up and even with all those kids conversing at near whispers, the over-all clamor washed out the sound of the orchestra. They almost couldn't hear themselves.

One middle school band kid who was sitting only ten feet away from the string players started yelling at his friend in the middle of our run through. Without even cutting the orchestra off, I immediate turned and started breathing fire on him.

Understand this... I'm not a screamer. If my kids have any kind of criticism of my teaching style at all... they'll tell you that I'm too nice, too forgiving, too tolerant. But when I tell you that I went ballistic on this kid, I mean I think they could hear me outside the gym with the doors closed.

His regular teacher yanked him out of the group (she may have sent him home) and I just went back to running the piece. At one point, however, I realized that it was useless: even with my VERY public temper flash, the noise level wouldn't stay below the orchestra. 30 teachers in the room and there was nothing we could do. I just had to resign myself that they wouldn't be heard, and that maybe the whole thing was a bad idea. The thing that was eating at me the most was the fact that my kids play well, and that they deserve better than that.

The concert started at 7, and the string group was on second, just after the combined high school band. When our turn came around, the district music coordinator got on the mic and begged the audience to be quiet for us....

...and that's when the miracle happened...

Something about the parents-in-the-room factor created a pin-drop silence... so much so that people in the audience later told me they could here the upper-string solo-trio with no problem. The crowd let us play, and play we did. Well. So once again, a situation I thought would be disastrous ended up being a total victory.

Today, instead of rehearsing, we passed around a few boxes of doughnuts and had a grand old time.

Going High-Tech.... kind of.

So, despite being a raging technophile, I've always been slow to incorporate modern technology into my classroom. Part of the problem is just not having enough time to explore some of the cooler stuff like SmartMusic. The other part of it is that I'm a strong believer in the simple idea that music is an ancient institution... and that as helpful as it is, all the modern gadegtry can't really improve upon the the basic, old-school approach to taking a concept of beauty and making it maifest in sound form.

Now, this is not to say that I don't like... nay LOVE technology, nor fail to see it's practical applications. In fact, the few things I've added to my routine (digital recording being chief among them) have been quite useful. But some things have been slow to grow on me.

Sometimes all it takes to get the ball rolling is a little help from an unexpected source.... like the day before Spring Break when someone walked in to my classroom and dropped off a box containing a brand-spankin-new projector. The funny thing is, I don't remember ordering it, but I didn't ask questions... I just nodded, smiled and signed the form on the clipboard.

Now of course, the first thing I did when we got back from break was break it in with a lunchtime viewing of one of my favorite DVDs. The next day I put that bad boy to work in both my band and AP Music Theory classes. After only a couple of days, I'm thinking that I want to build a permanent station for the projector right in front of my white board.

One of my music teacher friends showed me stuff on the Vic Firth web site where you can click on various "lesson" and play along with a midi groove while reading short rhythmic passages that are presented via flash player on the screen. It's supposed to be a drum thing, but you can have wind/string players play along on a chosen concert pitch. The lessons increase in complexity as you go along.

I used it in my AP Theory class to put up examples of stuff on the board, which cut out the time wasted on drawing staff lines (it also prevents me from subjecting my students to my horribly illegible chicken scratch). I also was able to do group practice on listening skills using the Ricci Adams site.

I know, I know.... a lot of y'all have been using projectors for years now. Some of you have far more impressive gear, like smartboards and stuff. Just allow me my moment of happiness here. How often does a music teacher get to enjoy something new without having to organize a massive fundraiser first?

So anyway, if any of you (particularly you music types) have any crazy ideas on how I can use this thing, I'll take suggestions.

Hit 'em where it hurts!

This last year I've experienced a sudden rush of people from high school and college finding and friending me on facebook. It's been fun catching up with people... we've all been posting photos from 15+ years ago. A bunch of my college friends got married and settled down in the same area where we went to school. Apparently some of them now have kids in the school distict that I used to work for. I know this because one of them is leading a very public charge against the district administration and the city council.

As far as I can tell, it all evolves around a controversy regarding the naming of a new high school. Residents want to name it after the town that the school will be built in. The school board and city council decided to name it after a retired board member, despite the fact that the community voted almost 4-1 against. That doesn't surprise me in the least. Back Woods Unified School District always was something of a good ol' boys club... The man in question was on the board since well before I worked for them. Heck, the principal who hired me is now the superintendent.

Anyway, the community is pissed that the admin isn't listening to them... so some of them are trying to encourage people to withhold their kids (of all grade levels) from the state standardized tests. They're distributing a form by any means necessary to as many people as possible.

.... wow....

Now, I can't imagine myself getting hot and bothered over the name of a school. It's also a little frightening to think that people everywhere may catch on that this one simple strategy could be the end-all means of forcing the will of the people onto school administrations... for better or worse.

Then again, I'm not living in the community that I grew up in, and have little or no emotional connection with my zip code. Furthermore, it does seem irresponsible for the school and city administration to blatantly ingore the requests of the people who put them in office, especially over an issue that probably should be left to the consensus. Finally, even if this does become a commonly used weapon of people vs. school administration... it seems it's only a natural consequence of a system that places so much value on test scores to begin with.

Being that it's not a matter involving curriculum, discipline or school policy... Im-a gonna have to go with the people. Besides, I've seen BWUSD try to throw its weight around before. This time they felt just a little too omnipotent.

Llama of the Week, (and then some)

So, I've been honored by fellow blogger Joel over at "So You Want To Teach?." He included me in a list of blogs he titled "20 Blogs I Wish Were Around When I started Teaching."

I count it as a great honor to be listed among blogs worth reading, especially since, as far as educational blogs go, CEFJ is merely an individual "from the trenches" account of one teacher's daily experiences. Going through my archives of posts, it doesn't take long to figure out the main purpose here seems to be to moan and complain about the principal that I currently work under. I don't offer much in the way of advice to young teachers, nor sharing strategies with fellow educators.

Still, I know it's reassuring to know that out there in the world, there are wise, thoughtful, enthusiastic, highly capable teachers who go through their own trials and tribulations just like I do.

In any case, go check out Joel's blog. He's really put a lot of work into it, and he's done a really good job of making it relevant to teachers from all walks of life.

April Grab-Bag

Choral Festival

Took my advanced choir to a choral festival on Friday. They did really well (Superior rating). As happy as that makes me, I was also a little peeved because a significant number of kids missed the event (because it was the Friday before Spring Break). Long story short - It was the only festival I could find on short notice (my fault for waiting too long) I told the kids I'd sign up for it if we didn't have too many people out because of the Spring Break factor. Back in early March they all smiled and nodded their heads. Then the closer we got to the date, more and more kids hit me with "Ummm... Mr. Maestro, I have a problem with April 3rd." By the time we got to a week before, half the women were out.

So I don't know exactly how to feel - I'm pissed that the people who bowed out didn't communicate with me in a responsible fashion. At the same time, I'm pissed at myself for not planning the whole thing better (I should have gotten into an earlier festival - had I done that, I could have made it a grade-required event.) But then they ended up doing well anyway - which is cool because... well it's cool. But it's also uncool because the people who missed won't think that it was a big deal.

Overall I'm glad we went, because it was the first festival we went to where we weren't one of the best choirs. Well... we were... but what I mean is that all the choirs who attended were either good or great. We were the last ones to take the stage. By the time we got up, the kids were kind of scared, and there was a shared feeling of "Forget being the best choir... we just want to avoid looking like unprepared slobs." They were also kind of nervous about the missing performers. I think that will help a lot in terms of setting up festivals for next year. The returning kids who will remember this one will help me put pressure on the rest of the group. Still, despite the loss of numbers (particularly in the alto section) they managed to kick ass.

And yes... I'm very proud of them. Once again, we distinguished ourselves as being the "traditional classical" choir, whereas the other groups went for more modern and multicultural selections. That doesn't make us "better" per se, but it did make us stand out a little.

Not bad for a band guy pretending to be a choir guy.

The Woes of Darth Weasel

So... DW missed a couple of days of school last week. Tuesday was college acceptance/rejection letter day. No sign of him. The following day, he was out too. Word on the street was that he got rejected by a bunch of schools and stayed home to... well, feel sorry for himself, I suppose.

Now, you can be sure that DW didn't get rejected by everybody. He's definitely going to go to college. But keep in mind that in this community, there is undeniable pressure to be accepted by as many designer label schools as possible. This is a bothersome trend. It used to be "go for your top pick and a few back-ups"... now it's a game of "my kid is better than yours" based on the number of acceptance letters." And apparently, DW is panting in the rear guard on that one.

Now, if I had to cut away all the symptoms and go to the heart of DW's fatal flaw, I would say that his overriding problem is that despite his academic prowess, he's severely insecure. He feels that people won't like or respect him unless he proves himself, and the only way he knows how to prove himself is to demonstrate his worth by showing that he's better than everyone else. This, by the way, is the same fatal flaw that Principal Palpatine possess. Actually, I think it's more accurate to say that they believe that if they prove themselves on paper, the world will be forced to respect them.

Unfortunately, what both of them fail to realize, is that if you treat other people badly in the process, then they won't be inclined to admire, nor respect you no matter how many accolades you heap upon yourself. They sure as hell won't trust you. It isn't enough to be good... you have to apply your awesomeness in a way that benefits other people.* If you can do that then the world will celebrate you. But ambition and ability without compassion, empathy and generosity is a recipe for loneliness.

I don't think either of them are going to figure that out any time soon. I almost feel sorry for them. Almost.

The Way Things Look In A Different Light

I'm sure this happens to a lot of people - You have a bunch of kids that you don't know at he beginning of the year... you spend a few days "getting to know them" but what you're really doing is building quick first impressions that you use to evaluate them for the rest of the year. The only problem is, sometimes those impressions are wrong.

My band class is such a lrage, mixed population that I think I assigned "block impressions" on a lot of them. That is to say - I looked at almost all of the drummers as being ADD saturated slackers. (Kind of sounds like a contradiction in terms, doesn't it?). So at the beginning of second semester I tried to encourage the counselors remove a bunch of them. Some of them got moved... not as many of them as I would have liked. I came up with a game plan to manage the remaining drummers, and for the most part, it worked.

But in the process, I discovered that a lot of the kids weren't as bad as I thought they were... they were just blending in with the horde. Individually, a lot of them were okay. Some of them turned out to be awesome. I started feeling bad that it took me five months to figure that out. But better to have realized it late than never.

Spring Break Is Here

Yeah, baby.

* I mean beyond the obvious honor of simply being in your presence.