I just had to submit a rather brutal evaluation for my student teacher. The teacher preparation process is supposed to nurture and prepare tomorrow's educators... but occasionally it has to be the shield that protects schools from people who shouldn't be in the classroom. I fear this year's student teaching arrangement is creeping towards the latter, if not hurtling.
I confess: I wonder if I am the right person to have taken on this apprentice. Her shortcomings would have been better served by someone more organized, methodical... and who is dealing with less educational baggage. (I am, after all, still trying to figure my own shit out.) I'm not taking responsibility for her, and I know I have my strengths (fortunately, they compensate for my weaknesses) But I feel like I'm not giving her much that she can take away and use herself. Maybe that's just my own teacher instinct kicking in: "How could I have helped her more?"
Last year's student teacher worked out better because she didn't 'need' me - she just needed the opportunity to get up and do her thing. I mean, yeah... she had to adjust here and there, and we put in plenty of time in reflection and feedback. But I held her hand far less, and I was never in fear for the integrity of my classroom.
*Sigh*
So yeah... I just filled out the evaluation online, and I hit "send" knowing full well that my current struggling , delicate little flower of a ST will, within seconds, receive an e-mail notifying her of my completion of the task, and that she can review it immediately.
She's taking the day off tomorrow to complete some other credential projects.
Monday will be interesting.
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1 comment:
Waiting with bated breath for the follow up post.
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